Two and a Half Men
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| Date (↑) | Episode # | Title | Network | Rating | Share | Viewers | Watch/Purchase DVD/Download |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 05/14/2012 | Oh Look! Al-Qaeda! | CBS | 7.3 | 11 | 11.5 | ||
| 09/27/2012 | 10-001 | I Changed My Mind about the Milk | CBS | 7.8 | 12 | 12.5 | |
| 10/04/2012 | A Big Bag of Dog | CBS | 7.6 | 12 | 12.3 | ||
| 10/11/2012 | Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt | CBS | 7.3 | 11 | 11.4 | ||
| 10/18/2012 | You Do Know What the Lollipop Is For | CBS | 8.5 | 13 | 13.6 | ||
| 10/25/2012 | That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam | CBS | 8 | 12 | 12.9 | ||
| 11/01/2012 | Ferrets, Attack! | CBS | 7.8 | 12 | 12.7 | ||
| 11/08/2012 | Avoid the Chinese Mustard | CBS | 8.8 | 13 | 14.1 | ||
| 11/15/2012 | Something My Gynecologist Said | CBS | 8.6 | 13 | 13.9 | ||
| 11/29/2012 | I Scream When I Pee | CBS | 8.6 | 13 | 13.7 | ||
| 12/06/2012 | One Nut Johnson | CBS | 8.4 | 13 | 13.5 | ||
| 12/13/2012 | Give Santa a Tail-Hole | CBS | 8.2 | 13 | 13.3 | ||
| 01/03/2013 | Welcome to Alancrest | CBS | 9.2 | 14 | 15.4 | ||
| 01/10/2013 | Grab a Feather and Get in Line | CBS | 8.8 | 14 | 14.4 | ||
| 01/31/2013 | Run Steven Staven! Run! | CBS | 8.4 | 13 | 13.7 | ||
| 02/07/2013 | Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It | CBS | 8.6 | 13 | 14.1 | ||
| 02/14/2013 | Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby | CBS | 8.4 | 13 | 13.7 | ||
| 02/21/2013 | Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries | CBS | 8.1 | 12 | 13.4 | ||
| 03/07/2013 | The 9:04 from Pemberton | CBS | 8.3 | 13 | 13.5 | ||
| 03/14/2013 | Big Episode: Someone Stole a Spoon | CBS | 7.7 | 12 | 12.2 | ||
| 04/04/2013 | Bazinga! That's from a TV Show | CBS | 8.5 | 14 | 13.7 | ||
| 04/25/2013 | Another Night with Neil Diamond | CBS | 7.2 | 12 | 11.3 | ||
| 05/02/2013 | My Bodacious Vidalia | CBS | 7.8 | 13 | 12.1 | ||
| 05/09/2013 | Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped | CBS | 7.9 | 13 | 12.8 | ||
| 09/26/2013 | 11-001 | Nangnangnangnang | CBS | 7.2 | 11 | 11.6 | |
| 10/03/2013 | I Think I Banged Lucille Ball | CBS | 6 | 9 | 9.3 | ||
| 10/10/2013 | This Unblessed Biscuit | CBS | 5.8 | 9 | 9.1 | ||
| 10/17/2013 | Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank | CBS | 5.5 | 9 | 8.6 | ||
| 10/24/2013 | Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003 | CBS | 5.4 | 8 | 8.5 | ||
| 11/07/2013 | Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants | CBS | 5.1 | 8 | 8.3 | ||
| 11/14/2013 | Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie | CBS | 5.4 | 9 | 8.7 | ||
| 11/21/2013 | Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room. | CBS | 5.4 | 9 | 8.7 | ||
| 12/05/2013 | Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer | CBS | 5.4 | 8 | 8.5 | ||
| 12/12/2013 | On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer! | CBS | 5.4 | 9 | 8.5 | ||
| 01/02/2014 | Tazed in the Lady Nuts | CBS | 5.4 | 8 | 8.7 | ||
| 01/09/2014 | Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball. | CBS | 5.9 | 9 | 9.6 | ||
| 01/30/2014 | Bite Me, Supreme Court | CBS | 5.6 | 9 | 8.9 | ||
| 02/06/2014 | Three Fingers of Creme de Menthe | CBS | 5.2 | 8 | 8.3 | ||
| 02/27/2014 | Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin | CBS | 6.2 | 10 | 10 | ||
| 03/06/2014 | How to Get Rid of Alan | CBS | 6.4 | 10 | 10.4 | ||
| 03/13/2014 | Welcome Home, Jake | CBS | 5.8 | 9 | 9.4 | ||
| 04/03/2014 | West Side Story | CBS | 5.9 | 9 | 9.2 | ||
| 04/10/2014 | Daddy's Got a Healthy Flavor Stick | CBS | 6.1 | 10 | 9.5 | ||
| 04/24/2014 | Lotta Delis in Little Armenia | CBS | 5.9 | 9 | 9.3 | ||
| 05/01/2014 | Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot | CBS | 5.7 | 9 | 9 | ||
| 05/08/2014 | Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead | CBS | 5.3 | 9 | 8.3 | ||
| 10/30/2014 | 12-001 | The Ol' Mexican Spinach | CBS | 6.4 | 10 | 10.3 | |
| 11/06/2014 | A Chic Bar in Ibiza | CBS | 5.7 | 9 | 9.1 | ||
| 11/13/2014 | Glamping in a Yurt | CBS | 5.5 | 9 | 8.8 | ||
| 11/20/2014 | Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight | CBS | 5.4 | 9 | 8.6 |
